This Week's WACKS
Our 1,023rd Edition
"Why would you ever introduce a rubber to the road?!"
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September 11th, 2015
In regards to the county clerk in Kentucky, President Obama reminded the nation that no one is above the law. Except, of course, Tom Brady.
A survey has identified Moscow, Russia, as the most unfriendly city in the world. The official city motto is now, "We don't hate everyone. We haven't met everyone!"
A San Francisco company is offering to send people's ashes to the Moon for $12,000. I wondered what Ralph Kramden was doing these days...
32-year-old Anne Hathaway says that she's already losing out on roles to younger actresses. Well, for actresses in Hollywood, 32 is the new 65.
The first poll done on Kanye West as a candidate for president shows that only 6% of people would consider voting for him. Then again, that puts him above half of the Republicans currently running.
Skip Tucker tells me that he and Bill Gates have a combined fortune of $80 billion.
Pope Francis has simplified the annulment process. Not saying that it won't work, just letting you know it'll be easier if it doesn't...
Hey, your holiness, could you start working on the concept of a presidential annulment? I think we might be needing one in the near future...
What this country needs is a drone that would pick me up and take me to work on Mondays...
Not surprising, the Tuesday, after Labor Day was "I keep thinking it's a different day" Week.
Donald Trump signed the Republican pledge saying that he will not run as a third party candidate if he doesn't win the Republican nomination. Of course, he signed it with the name, R.U. Kidding.
Donald Trump was scheduled to call "The View" on Thursday. Never heard if they answered the phone.
Former Miss Nevada Katie Rees was arrested for possession of meth. Now her Walter White and Sudafed tattoos make a lot more sense...
Does anyone else find it ironic that if you're a government worker opposed to gay marriage that your punishment is being put in a jail cell, surrounded by people who are for it?
Tom Brady and Gisselle Bundchen were seen on a date, holding hands. So apparently there's pressure on their marriage, but he's managed to release a little of it. Probably enough that he had to destroy his cell phone again.
J.K. Rowling tweeted the other day that we've been pronouncing Valdemort the wrong way all these years. According to her, the T is supposed to be silent. Then again, his whole name is supposed to be silent. Of course, my reaction was, "Oh, shi!"
Why would French scientists want to 'wake up' a 30,000 virus just to study it? And how did they find the scientists who have never seen a Sci-Fi movie before?
TOP FIVE SIGNS YOU'RE A SERIOUS FOOTBALL FAN
- Each morning, you decide who uses the bathroom first with a coin toss
- Once a week, you check the balls of your feet to make sure they're properly inflated
- No makeup... just face paint
- Yard markers in the living room
- Goalposts on the hamper
TOP FIVE SIGNS THERE'S A GORILLA LOOSE IN YOUR HOUSE
- For God's sake, use the bathroom and stop throwing things!!!
- Someone's been standing on your scale model of the Empire State Building
- Banana peels, everywhere!
- Someone has been jumping and shedding on the couch
- Door broken open on the gorilla cage in the rec room
Laugh a little, would ya?
Tim
PSPS---It's that anniversary again. Thoughts on my blog
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PS6--NEW My podcast is back! Tony Miner guest stars on the latest episode right here.