They say once you go WACK, you never go back

Hillary Clinton says after the election she thought of never leaving her house again. Bill Clinton only had to two words to say: "Oh, great."

McDonald's is unveiling something called a Nutella burger at its locations in Italy. Apparently for those days when you don't deserve a break.

From my friend, Etta: A new study says that women who have a little extra weight always live longer than the men who mention it.

Kanye West has canceled all of the remaining shows on his tour, just in time for Thanksgiving.
 
There’s a new workout where people crawl like a baby. Next time you see me on a Friday night, crawling, I could be working out. Don’t be so quick to judge.
 
Hillary Clinton is now up to a 2-million vote lead in the popular vote count. And Cleveland hosted four of the seven World Series games, so they win, right?
 
Vice President Joe Biden and Vice President-elect Mike Pence had lunch together this week. We don’t know which one picked Chuck E. Cheese.
 
They say that when VP Mike Pence went to see “Hamilton” the other night, he had one of the worst times in the theater since Lincoln. Too soon?

A study says cursing is linked to higher intelligence. No (beep)!

An infidelity website says November 18th is the most likely date that a person's partner will cheat on them. And if you can't trust an infidelity website...

So far, the Obama to Trump transition has been going pretty smoothly, if you don't include the cast of "Hamilton."

TOP FIVE SIGNS IT'S GOING TO BE A ROUGH THANKSGIVING

1. "Turkey? I thought YOU were cooking the turkey?"
2. "Did I ever mention that sweet potatoes give me gas?"
3. "Yeah, worst cold I've ever had. I'll start passing the food."
4. "But I thought you said you and your six kids couldn't make it?"
5. Instead of a movie or football game, Uncle Harold is putting the 3rd Presidential Debate on the TV

TOP FIVE EXPERIMENTAL THANKSGIVING FOODS THAT DIDN'T CATCH ON

1. Cranberry Jell-O Shots (tasted good, it's just that no one made it through the meal)
2. Yam Spam (thank ya, ma'am)
3. Turkey Fondue
4. Sweet Potato Jerky
5. Pumpkin-Spiced Olives

TOP FIVE THINGS NOT HEARD AT THAT VERY FIRST THANKSGIVING

1. "Doest thou know if yon turkey is gluten-free?"
2. "Canst I turn on the football game, goodwife?"
3. "No. No! Don't pulleth Uncle Henry's finger!"
4. "Turneth off thy video gaming contraption!"
5. "He's not my chief!"

Laugh a little, would ya?