All things WACKY in one easy-to-delete email

They say once you go WACK, you never go back


If you know someone that might enjoy receiving this email, pass it along their direction and invite them to sign up. If there's someone you really don't like, you can pass this along to them, too!
Remember, if you'd like to hear most of these jokes delivered on the radio, check out my morning radio gig on krko.com, weekdays from 6-9am PST.

THIS WEEK'S WACK
These jokes are available on a daily basic
through Radio-Online. Click here for a free demo

Our 1,216th Edition
June 3rd, 2019

May the Fourth be with you. Wait, it's July. That doesn't work

Actress Allison Williams and her husband Ricky Van Veen are separating. Those of you who had four years in the pool, please collect your winnings.

The Dalai Lama has been quoted as saying that if a woman succeeds him, that she should be attractive. This from the guy who was the reason they didn't do "The Bachelor: Dalai Lama."

Go to the O'Reilly Auto Parts website (https://www.oreillyauto.com) and type "121G" into the search bar. Thanks, Skip!

From Facebook: Whenever I'm mad at someone, I bake them a batch of chocolate cookies and put in one raisin per cookie, just to mess with them.

A survey says 56% of Americans stay up at night from money worries. The remaining 44% have learned how to order from Amazon in their sleep.

A poll says 42% of Americans feel speaking Spanish during debates is pandering. In fact, I would go as far as saying, "Muey pandering."

Harry and Meghan as well as William and Kate attended one of the games of that Yankees/Redsox series in London over the weekend. My guess is that they were for the Yankees and not the team where they wasted all of that tea.

Good Housekeeping did the survey--Only 45% of women under 45 make their bed every day. 71% of women over 45 make their bed every day. Only 9% of men actually help make the bed. Although, in their defense, that's up for 8-7/8%, so we are improving.

A new study says that napping increases productivity, improves your memory, your learning capacity and awareness. At least, that's why I tried to convince my boss of the other day when he caught me sleeping...

It's almost time to celebrate that day that defines our nation and what sets us apart from the rest of the world. Yep, Amazon Prime Day is a week from Monday.

A musical based on the life of Liberace is being planned for Broadway. For our younger listeners, Liberace is not an Italian dish.

A study says following the Dash diet cuts the risk of heart failure by half. I'm not familiar with that one. Dine and Dash, yes, and it does help you get your exercise in... .

A study says being "pear shaped" is healthier for the heart than being "apple shaped." It doesn't say anything about "watermelon shaped." I was curious, too...

A British man has visited a record 51,784 pubs over the past 40 years. He was recently presented the Titanium Liver Award.

Washington, D.C. has been rated as the worst run city in the U.S.. Of course, they have such a great role model, right there.

A study says atheists are nicer to Christians than the other way around. Of course, atheists believe that. Then again, it's about the only thing they believe.

From my buddy, Skip Tucker: Sing like you don't need the money; love like you'll never get hurt; dance like there's nobody watching; email like it may one day be read aloud in a deposition. 

A man died from salmonella poisoning 10 days after eating a gecko on a dare at a party. He also no longer saves 15% on his car insurance.
 
Two warehouses filled with 45,000 barrels of Jim Beam Whiskey burned to the ground Wednesday. Can a National Day of Mourning be far behind?
 
I suppose the good news would be...It was only Jim Beam.
 

TOP FIVE FIRST DRAFTS OF FAMOUS SAYINGS FROM OUR FOREFATHERS

  1. It is better to be alone than by yourself
  2. By failing to prepare, you'll never heard the end of it from your wife.
  3. You can't put a price on the price of freedom.
  4. Give me liberty or get me another beer!
  5. A penny saved is neurotic!

TOP FIVE OTHER THINGS PAUL REVERE COULD HAVE SAID ON HIS FAMOUS RIDE

  1. "The Redcoats are coming and with, oh my God, those shoes!"
  2. "Look, ma, no hands!"
  3. "My legs are chaffing! My legs are chaffing!"
  4. "200 years from now, they'll have a cookware named after me"
  5. "The British are SO coming!"
Laugh a little, would ya?
 
PS--Don't forget about our friend, Ima Norwegian.  A new cartoon every week!
PSPS--Stalk me on Twitter for daily Wacks!
The Wacky Week Podcast is alive and well.
On    Apple   Stitcher  Spotify   Radio Public  Anchor  Breaker  Pocketcasts

And here's something brand-new!

Click here to hear some of the fun interviews I've already done at KRKO
 
Copyright ©2019 All rights reserved, but they get boisterous when drunk

Want to change how you receive these emails? We give you options.
You can update your preferences or unsubscribe from this list

www.wackyweek.com