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Our 1,234th Edition
November 8th, 2019

Good month to wreck an Edmond Fitzgerald, huh?

Leonard Kleinrock, who helped develop the Internet, is asking how it went so wrong? He should ask Al Gore.

A Kentucky woman is being charged with shooting at a KFC drive-thru when she wasn't given a fork and napkin. Nothing worse than a neat criminal.

I've always laughed at the phrase, "Yes, but they're better than their record." That's like saying, "Yeah, he murdered a couple of people, but he's a nice guy!"

Scientists are saying there is an obvious link between diet and exercise, and Alzheimer's. Well, it's a good thing I avoid those two things then...

The original movie, "Bladerunner" was set in November of the year in the future 2019. The world is not quite was predicted, but one thing that the movie and our present-day reality have in common: in both situations, the Seattle Mariners had never won a World Series.

McDonalds has fired their CEO after he had an inappropriate consensual affair with an employee. Apparently, he wanted more than just fries with that.

I believe very strongly in living in the now, although I'll quickly point out that next year, Halloween falls on a Saturday that includes a full moon and it's the night we turn the clocks back. OK, I'm back.

Fiat Chrysler is going to merge with Peugeot. I'm trying to think what the new company will be called. Few Go? Go for a fee?

A study says early retirement can speed up cognitive decline. I'll remember to watch for that when I can finally afford to retire in my early 120s.

Lyon College in Arkansas will offer a course brewing beer to learn science. Students are being encouraged not to study and drive.

From Facebook: You don't need a parachute to go skydiving... you only need a parachute if you plan to go more than once.

Experts are saying that if you put up your Christmas decorations early, it makes you happier. However, if you put them up like in July, it might help you get committed.

Scientists are working on a chemical to erase bad memories. Which is great news for me, because that means you could listen to this show more often.

A British couple ordered $450 in Domino's Pizza for their wedding meal. That pretty much clears the way for all wedding gifts to come from the Dollar Store.

A black cat wandered out on the field during the Giants/Cowboys game Monday night. The most embarrassing part-it ended up with more yards than the Giants.

The new holiday cups have arrived at Starbucks. Now you can have your name spelled wrong on four different styles.

A report says San Francisco now has more dogs than children. If you're going, be sure to wear some flowers in your fur.

These days, ‘the San Francisco Treat' is walking down a sidewalk without stepping in anything.

A study says 8 in 10 Millennials believe they are not "good enough." Can I just say, they suck at self-esteem.

A study says running once a week could significantly lower the risk of death. Especially if you live near lions.

Mississippi has been rated as the fattest state in the U.S.. And yes, Mississippi, this survey does make you look fat.

From my buddy, Skip Tucker: I'm not saying I drink a LOT of coffee, but I'm fairly sure my body will probably continue moving for about 24 hours after I die.

A study says some people will say anything to end up having sex. I'm having a hard time figuring out the ‘news' part of this one.

A man in India died in a challenge to eat 50 eggs. On the positive side, he did win the challenge.

This October was the hottest ever recorded on Earth. That explains the popularity of the "Speedo Trump" costumes.

Starbucks is opening its first "signing store" that will offer over-priced coffee to deaf customers.

In a new poll, a majority of voters believe Donald Trump will be reelected. And it's looking more and more likely I'm going to have to start coloring my hair.

In England, thieves broke into a semi-truck trailer and stole over a million dollars worth of sex toys. The suspects are described as armed and vibrating.


  1. Cranberry Manilow
  2. CeeLo Green Bean Casserole
  3. Alicia Tur-Keys
  4. Yam Smith
  5. Jack White Meat


  1. Maketh the new land great again.
  2. Thanksgiving? That's cray cray.
  3. Have your pilgrims call my pilgrims.
  4. Text thee later.
  5. How's thoust hangin'?


  1. "Miles Still Standish"
  2. "God Friendeth Me"
  3. "The Real Housewives of Plymouth Colony"
  4. "Fresh off the Mayflower"
  5. "Good Morning, New World"
Laugh a little, would ya?
PS--Don't forget about our friend, Ima Norwegian.  A new cartoon every week!
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