This Week's Wacks
Our 865th Edition
"You gotta wonder who much longer this can go on"
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June 29th, 2012

In Fort Lauderdale last week, a 400-pound woman decided to strip off all her clothes and wait for a bus completely naked. Police showed up and arrested her... very carefully.

President Obama says that Mitt Romney doesn't really understand what it takes to be president and how much there is to do: International diplomacy, Economic stability, hunting vampires...

Call me pragmatic, but I believe Ann Curry should hold off on getting that "Today Show" tattoo.

"Jeopardy" host Alex Trebek suffered a minor heart attack over the weekend. I'm sorry. What did Alex Trebek experience over the weekend?

"General Hospital" won five daytime Emmy's, including the much coveted "Wow, you're a soap opera and you're still on the air" award.

For those of you who don't follow politics, just think of Obamacare as a Porsche and the Supreme Court as Lindsay Lohan.

Alex Trebek is said to be doing quite well following his heart attack last weekend. The toughest part has been getting information from his doctors in the form of questions.

Rodney King's family is asking for help to fund a public memorial service for him. They've got enough money for a short one... but with enough donations, we can all get a long.

A new study says more doctors are falling asleep on the job these days. My next procedure, I'm bringing coffee.

Instagram is a computer program? Oh, all this time, I thought it was the scientifically measured weight you put on just by looking at an ice cream Sundae.

And we'll get back to America's "War on Obesity" right after this next dessert...

That guy who hacked into Scarlett Johansson's computer and leaked out nude photos of her will get 5 years in jail and our undying gratitude.

A new survey found that Tampa is the vainest city in the U.S.. In fact, they're being featured in the latest edition of "Vanity Most" magazine.

Barry Becher, the original infomercial pitchman and the guy who introduced us to Ginsu knives, died last week at the age of 71. Remembrances should be sent in four easy payments of only $14.99

Kanye West gave Jay-Z a pretty cool father's day gift -- a jewel encrusted golden skull worth $34,000. Yeah, won't be bumping into him at Ross.

Obama and Rodney are said to be "Neck and neck" in quite a few states. Ironically, at least two of those states don't allow two men to be neck and neck.

Ann Curry has said goodbye to "The Today Show." Next week, they'll start their summer promotion, "Where in the world is Matt Lauer's conscience?"

I wasn't watching "The Today Show" -- who has time in the morning? But now, to protest Ann's departure, I'm going to start watching just so I can stop.

TOP FIVE SIGNS YOU'RE IN SERIOUS FINANCIAL TROUBLE

  1.     Named number one person to avoid by Loan Shark magazine
  2.     At the store, they won't accept your cash
  3.     They ask you for ID after asking you for ID
  4.     Your checking account has had more bounces than Pam Anderson during an earthquake
  5.     You've made Greece feel better about their situation


                               Tim

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