This Week's Wacks
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December 21st, 2012

Maybe the Mayans were just predicting the end of calendars?  After all, these days, we just use our phones.

By the way, if they were right, this will be the last edition of Wacky Week.

But before we go, check out this year's holiday video.  For the second year in a row, I borrowed the singing talents of Alana Baxter, combined them with the audio recording talents of Scott Burns, then put on a cow suit, videotaped and edited together this ditty called, "He rides a sleigh", based on the Katy Perry song, "Wide Awake."  Merry Christmas to all!

A love letter written by a young Mick Jagger sold at auction for $300,000. I say how old the letter was, but it was written in hieroglyphics.

Scientists have determined that some 7,000-year-old pottery pieces came from a pot used long ago to make cheese. Their biggest clue were ancient words written on the side of the pot, that said, "Would you like a little cheese with that whine?"

L.A. Reid says he's done with the X-Factor after this season and won't be coming back. So I'm a season ahead of him.

In Brazil, someone has opened a love motel... for dogs. For the serious relationship or just puppy love...

There's a "people style" joke in there, if you dare.

Frankly, if we can't figure out a way to prevent things like what happened in Connecticut last week, than I'm OK with the Mayans being right.

"The Hobbit" broke the box office record held by "Lord of the Rings," earning more than $84-million in its opening weekend! I got your "precious" right here...

Pennsylvania police arrested a woman with 170 packets of heroin inside her bra. All together now: "Yes, it was quite a large bust!"

There's a children's book out there called, "Walter the farting dog." Brings a whole new meaning to "Silent Night."

I hate the way the media exploits things, like all this hype about the Mayans and their supposed prediction of the end of the world this Friday. Then again, if they are right, I will have created my Fiscal Cliff Board Game for nothing.

There's been some clarification. It turns out the Mayans were actually predicting the end of the New York Jets. Turns out, they were right!

So, I'm curious--do you run, screaming out into the street and lamenting the end of the world on Apocalypse Eve or Apocalypse morning?

I'm about as optimistic as a Mayan shopping at Costco.

We're coming up on the weekend where, if you feel like it's the end of the world, you're either a Mayan or a last-minute Christmas shopper.

I plan to eventually forgive myself, but at the moment, I'm not speaking to me.

Oh, it's STREAMING music, not "steaming" music. No wonder all my CD's warped.

Cassadee Pope has won the 3rd season of "The Voice" and will go on to enjoy the fame and popularity of the other two winners, whatever their names are.

Somehow, I've found myself going from "Oh, there's plenty of time" to "Oh my God -- it's next Tuesday" overnight!

From my buddy, RD: Wife texts husband, on a cold winter's morning: "Windows frozen." Husband texts back: "Pour some lukewarm water over it." Wife texts back, 5 minutes later: "Computer completely messed up now."

It turns out that the video of an eagle trying to snatch a child making the rounds on the Internet was a fake.  We should have known: any NFL fan could tell you that, this year, the Eagles can't catch anything.

Mayans are supposedly predicting the end of the world will happen today. Some say the signs were there, particularly New York Jets fans.

A new study says that a recently discovered star might have water on it and may be able to sustain life….or, at least a Starbucks.


  1.     That ticking package better be a clock
  2.     The gift-wrapped ax in the computer screen is a definite hint
  3.     Wait! Didn't I give someone this gift last year?
  4.     You received a computer Christmas virus
  5.     The words Merry Christmas carved into your desk


  1.     "O Holy Crap!"
  2.     "Adeste Kardashian"
  3.     "Here Comes Donald Trump!"
  4.     "Away in a Condo"
  5.     "O little town of Schenectady"


  1.     The New York Jets Winning the Superbowl This Year
  2.     The big Brad Pitt/Jennifer Aniston 10th wedding anniversary party
  3.     Twinkies forever (they could have just been referring to their shelf life)
  4.     Lindsay Lohan would not be arrested for six months
  5.     We could start with their prediction about President Romney

That's it for the year!  Wacky Week will return in 2013 unless you know something I don't.

Merry Christmas and a kick arse New Year!


PS--Comedy based on a song from the 90s.  Don't miss our Facebook Post of the Week.
PSPS--My two cents on the madness in Connecticut.  Right here on my blog.
PSPSPS--If you're into Facebook, I'm right here
PSPSPSPS---Follow Tim's Tweets on Twitter @timwack
PSPSPSPSPS--She's Ima Norwegian.  Catch her every Sunday on my Facebook page. She's also threatening to start her own blog at