This Week's Wacks
Our 972nd Edition
"Ah, those three precious words everyone likes to hear--Back to School!"
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September 5th, 2014
I mean, when you think about it, wouldn't you think that anyone who would date Miley Cyrus would have to be guilty of something?
Joan Rivers is resting comfortably in the hospital and putting on a good face. Well, let's just say she's resting comfortably...
A lawyer in the IRS ethics office is facing disbarment over lying. Thank God taxpayers can't get in trouble for that!
A study claims that smartphones are stunting the social skills of students. I'd believe that. It's like The Three R's these days are readin', 'ritin' and resending.
There's a new app helps people find jobs in the legal marijuana industry. Of course, the first challenge is always finding their phone.
A poll says the average American's work week is now between 47 and 60 hours. As you know, it would be a lot less without Facebook.
The U.S. Forest Service has published a paper on how to safely roast marshmallows. What's next? "50 ways to s'more?"
There's a report that the new iPhone 6 will have environmental sensors that will measure the temperature and barometric pressure. Which means, 24 hours a day, you'll be able to tell that the weather forecast was wrong.
Once again, we're reminded of that old saying: "Naked pictures of you can never leak online if they don't exist."
I knew you could find the video online. It took a lot of searching, but in spite of the gruesome warnings, I watched it anyway -- that "Saved by the Bell" TV movie was HORRIBLE!!!
By the way, Apple's next big announcement that will make you regret buying a new phone last year is next Tuesday.
OK, you can announce the release of a leaf-raking app any day now...
Why does this 4-day work week seem longer than the usual ones?
Demi Lovato has launched her own skin care line. I don't know about you, but my life is now more complete. Oh-oh, that set off the sarcasm alarm.....
Scotland is two weeks away on voting on independence. Those who want to stay with Great Britain. Those opposed are part of the "Stay Together" movement, while those in favor of the measure are part of the "Well, how much will it cost?" party.
As we approach flu season, remember: it's OK to sneeze into your elbow. It's not OK to sneeze into someone else's elbow.
New research seems to indicate that standing could be one of the best anti-aging things you could do. Who knew the national anthem would be so healthy?
And see, that's why I didn't give up my seat on the bus to that old lady. I was only thinking of her health!
Al-Qaeda has now expanded into India, putting them at a solid number 2 behind Starbucks.
A Japanese company is getting ready to sell a robot that can walk at 2.6 mph and can even perform a somersault. Good. Now I don't have to….
A survey says that only half of all women can locate the vagina on a diagram. Fortunately, I studied geography and know that it's the one just east of West Vagina.
In an effort to stop thieves from stealing naked photos from the cloud, I just posted mine up there. That'll teach 'em.
TOP FIVE NEW TV SHOWS THAT PROBABLY AREN'T GOING TO MAKE IT
- "Law and Order: Jaywalk Unit"
- "Ninja Nuns"
- "Arrested an Elephant"
- "The Grocery List"
- "The Walking Seniors"
TOP FIVE COOL THINGS WE HOPE THE NEW IPHONE HAS
- How about capitalizing the "i" at the beginning of iPhone?
- A back scratching up (again, if you don't ask... )
- Kate Upton's home phone number
- A time travel app (hey, if you don't ask, you don't get)
- An automatic movie theater silencing device
Laugh a little, would ya?
Tim
PSPS--It was a Long Beach Labor Day Weekend. Details on my blog
PSPSPS--Check out this week's new 'toon and archives full of Ima Norwegian!
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